An open letter to my sonPosted: October 17, 2009
Man, I have to say, you seem to be going along just fine. The grades are looking good. You’re a damn good looking guy. A talented musician. Parents and teachers tell me stories about things that you do that show what a really kind person you are; when I bring them up, you act as if they’re no big deal.
Despite all the good news, I’ve got to say that perhaps we let you down in one respect. When we picked your name, we were quite content with it.
Then the other day came, the one with the boy in the balloon…or not in the balloon.
Why didn’t we think to give you a cool name like Falcon? Have we given you everything you need so succeed in the world? Looking at the names people in the news give their children, I wonder if we have robbed you of your chance to be different from the crowd.
One thing We’ve tried to teach you is to own up to mistakes, learn, and then try to correct them. I’m going to do that here.
In order to be sure you have every advantage, I am going to have your name legally changed. I just don’t know that you are going to get a fair shake with people named Falcon, Track, Willow, Apple and Couvosier out there in the world. I figure we can get this taken care of for you before you leave for college next fall.
I am going to choose your name the way any reasonable parent in my position would. I am going to leave the decision to strangers on the internet.
Blurt readers, please help me get the strange name he needs before he heads off to college. Choose from the options available in the poll below.
Think about how great it is going to be to meet your roomate and all your college bandmates next fall with your new name. Thanks for being who you are, buddy. I hope that won’t change with your new name.