Science and the Invisiblity Cloak

Why does this look completely ineffective to me?

The big scientific news from last week is that scientists have taken the first step toward creating an “invisibility cloak”. Stories on the subject explain that scientists were able to “conceal a bump on a gold surface that measured 0.00004 inches high by 0.00005 wide”.

I submit to you, my friends, that something that small is already invisible. I know change and science are incremental in the way they progress, but making it impossible for me to see what I already can’t see is no progress whatsoever.

If this was you, thank you. You were delicious

As I draft this, all of you are invisible to me, unless you are some really good Kung Pao Chicken or my notebook.

Given that you are invisible to me and you can’t see me despite the fact that I am communicating with you should bring you to an obvious conclusion. I am responsible for the first instances of human invisibility.

Not mine

If you could see me, you’d know that I achieved this without even putting on a lab coat. I know it is hard to believe that I could do this without the proper garb, but look at me. The proof is right before your eyes. Of course, you can’t see me to validate what I’m telling you. That itself validates what I’m telling you. I am currently invisible.

I am also working on the concept that if i forget something, it does not exist anymore. I know that we were all taught in school that matter cannot be created or destroyed. I believe that if I can achieve full forgetfulness of that concept, I will be able to make things cease to exist forever.

If you can only see The Invisible Man because of his clothes, when you can't see him he is...

I’ve already put this theory to the test by forgetting concepts. For instance, I know that there was a Pythagorean Theorem. I don’t remember what it did or why I needed to know it.  I can not reproduce it, so it must be gone.

On the other hand, there are people and things I remember. Sometimes I don’t see some people for months, and then I do. They were just invisible during that time, then they come back. What can we conclude from this? I think it implies that people really should be doing what they can to remind me of themselves because if I forget…gone.

So, I am able to create invisibility as well as destroy concepts and matter. I scoff at scientists who “create” invisibility using things that can’t be seen anyhow.

Patent Attorneys, call me.

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24 Comments on “Science and the Invisiblity Cloak”

  1. izaakmak says:

    I bow to The Master! But Master, can you teach me how to make that super-model I’ve had my eye on appear beside me in bed? 😕 😆

    • omawarisan says:

      Oh, that one? She is at your place, but she is invisible. Remember, if you can’t see her…she’s…? When you get home, start tossing a blanket in the air. when it lands over her, you’ll be able to tell she’s there.

  2. linlah says:

    The Pythagorean Theorem has always been inviible to me.

  3. Pie says:

    My brain is now bleeding from the strain of working through your concept (and believe me, it doesn’t take much, especially on a Monday). Thanks, Oma. Thanks a lot.

  4. Betty says:

    My dog thinks she has an invisibility cloak if she happens to be half way under the comforter. In dog-think: if I can’t see you, you can’t see me.

    • omawarisan says:

      I used to play hide and seek with a kid that thought like that. He’d stand behind a tree with his face close to it. I considered talking to him about it, but I was really competitive as a kid.

  5. Counter Culture Clown says:

    What do you mean something that small is already invisible! WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?!

    >_> Tiny penis joke. FTW.

  6. Karen says:

    The first one didn’t show up. According to Omawarisan’s Theory of Invisibility, it did not exist. So, I tried again. Then there were two. Now I look dumb. But, I’m comfortable with that.

  7. writerdood says:

    ___ _ ____ _ ____ _

  8. planetross says:

    I think “matter” can be turned into “doesn’t matter” very easily. hee hee!

    Can you imagine a world with invisibility cloaks?
    It would be a nightmare!

    • omawarisan says:

      God, please tell me that isn’t a private school. I’d be pissed if I paid good money for an education and my child was that stupid. Sure, it would be my fault he was that stupid, but I’d have to blame someone!

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