The Angelina Jolie Pez Project

 

A Pez of your very own! Interested? Read on.

 

In a recent post I made reference to Angelina Jolie. As we know, she is the chosen one who will save the world from certain disaster while simultaneously maintaining the attention of the entire planet, producing and raising all its children and providing entertainment.

In that post, I referred her as shooting out kids like a Pez. Later, through my extensive research I learned that 3 of her children are (quite admirably on her part) adopted. All the same, I like the idea of her as a Pez. There is no explaining it.

The reaction I got on the site and in email got me to thinking about how to use the Jolie Pez idea.

At first, my idea was to create a Pez of her to travel the world and save it. That isn’t really going to be  feasible. My friends, I will soon be looking to you to help me with the project called…

The Angelina Jolie Pez Project

You had to see that coming, didn’t you? Seriously, it is the title of the whole post.

Here is the premise. I am currently awaiting the arrival of an action figure of Ms. Jolie that I bought from eBay. Originally I was planning to mount the head of this toy onto a Pez dispenser for this venture into foolishness. The aim was for this Jolie Pez to travel the world by mail, visiting Blurt readers and saving the world, or at least seeing it.

The more I’ve looked at modifying the Pez, the more I realized it would not come out the way I wanted it to. I changed the plan just a bit, still maintaining the elements of Pez and Jolie visiting readers all over the world. Here is the plan.

The Plan

Alright, you saw that coming. You had to, right?

The Angelina Jolie action figure, which will now be referred to as The Jolie, will travel the world by mail – first class of course. Let me explain how, together, we are going to ensure The Jolie sees the word.

1. You let me know in the comments or by email that you’d like a visit from The Jolie.
2. I send The Jolie in the mail, you keep it for a week and show her a good time. Take her to the office, bring her to your favorite bars and restaurants, sporting events and tourist destinations. Document The Jolie’s travels with digital photos.
3. Email me the photos of your adventures with her for publication here on Blurt.
4. I’ll send you the address of the next person to get a visit from The Jolie. You mail her to that destination and her adventures continue.

FAQ

 

Oh, the places she will go.

 

It might be a little presumptuous to have Frequently Asked Questions about something that I am only now telling you about. Be that as it may, here they are:

• Where will The Jolie travel? Anywhere she can be mailed. The Jolie will be a citizen of the world. International borders are nothing to her. She wants to save the whole world.
• Are there limits on what activities The Jolie will take part in? The Jolie is adventuresome. The sky is the limit. Please just remember to see to your personal safety as well as The Jolie’s whenever you photograph her adventures. This wont apply to most Blurt readers, but since this is the internet I have to specify that I won’t publish photos of The Jolie in x-rated situations.
• May I publicize my blog? If you have a blog, I will absolutely put a link to it in the post with your pictures.
• Will this cost me anything? Just postage to her next destination. I would ask you to keep in mind that the destination that follows your visit may be outside your nation, so postage to that destination might be a little higher than mailing your water bill across town.
• Who is eligible to do this? Anyone.  I’d like this to be an ongoing series of posts so the more the merrier. I can’t say that she her destinations will be selected in the order they are received. Since The Jolie will be traveling the world to help save it I have to take her mission into account in selecting destinations.
• Do I have to appear in the pictures, give my name, etc? No. Shoot pictures any way that makes you comfortable. If it is easier to hold her up and take her picture next to something, fine. If you want a friend to photograph you and The Jolie together at one of your landmarks, help yourself. I will associate no more information with your photos than you tell me to…And before I move on, I have a question for you –
• Why are you asking questions in italics and where did you learn to speak that way? I guess I’m just comfortable that way. It is something I learned as a kid. My parents spoke italic around the dinner table

Will You Help The Jolie Travel The World?

The Jolie can’t save the world if she can’t see it. She needs your help. Let me know in the comments if you want The Jolie to visit you. I’ll get your mailing address via email as your visit opportunity comes up. If you’re travelling somewhere special that you believe needs a visit from The Chosen One please let me know!

Got Pez?

No, you don’t. We all love Pez, but beyond a certain age we become less comfortable about buying them. Here is the special bonus. I will mail a Pez to everyone who participates in the Angelina Jolie Pez project.

That’s right, as if getting a visit from The Jolie wasn’t enough, when it is all over and she moves on to her next destination you get Pez! You will be luxuriously eating candy from the throat of a yet unspecified cartoon character. Surely you will be the envy of all who lay eyes upon you.

Sign up now muchachos!

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