The Policies Of My Administration: Autobiography TitlesPosted: August 30, 2010 | |
Not long ago I received a missive from a friend who reads the blog. The note let me know that “singer” Ricky Martin has an autobiography coming out in November. The title of Mr. Martin’s autobiography is Me. My friend inquired about my thoughts on that choice of title. That question is the source of this policy.
On A Personal Note
Before I explain my administration’s policy on autobiographies, a quick message to my friend.
It disturbs me that you are aware of this sort of information on Ricky Martin. I certainly hope that this is not an indication that you are, on some level, a fan of his music. If this were the case, it would be a clear violation of the friendship agreement you signed. I direct your attention to Section 2, Parts A-C, entitled Unacceptable Musical Tastes.
While I would not think of exercising my legal right to dissolve said agreement, I will certainly exercise my right to look at you in a manner I deem to be befitting someone who would listen to such music. Please issue a statement of reassurance at your earliest convenience at your first opportunity and lets put this ugly incident behind us.
As to the policy implications of Martin’s autobiography being named Me, I am going to say something that disturbs me.
I think Ricky Martin is on to something. Please note that I am limiting that statement strictly to the area of autobiography titling.
My administration will cause a major change to occur to the publishing industry and in library science. Effective when I take over, all autobiographies will be required to be entitled Me. Autobiographies already in print will be retitled.
It just makes too much sense to me not to have it that way.
Regarding Library Science
Those who know me best, know that I am a major supporter of the Dewey Decimal System. Of all the various decimal systems, it is my informed opinion that Dewey is the finest.
I aware that most people have the Dewey Decimal System committed to memory, so making a major change in it would lead to chaos. I am very anti-chaos.
Despite the retitling, autobiographies will be found with the other 920 call numbers, just where you’ve always found them. They will all be titled Me, and shelved in alphabetical order according to the author/subjects last name.
A Notable Exception
The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman will be filed with the autobiographies, even though it is a historic novel concerning a fictional character. The new title of this book will be Me, Even Though I Never Existed Other Than As A Character In An Important Story About A Dark Period In US History, By Miss Jane Pittman, but actually by Ernest J. Gaines.
Other similarly titled books will be handled on a case by case basis based on this model.