Spring Is Here. It Could Be Worse. I Could Be A Bee.


If you've seen these commercials, is this bee supposed to be French or Spanish? His accent changes. I hate him. (Image by spike55151 via Flickr)

If I were a bee, you and I would get along just fine.

I’m not prone to getting overly excited about things. Under the circumstance of being a bee, I’d probably make an additional effort to be cool-headed about whatever went on around me. After all, I’d have enough peers who were ready to fly off the handle at any provocation. There are plenty of bees zipping around out there with a chip on their shoulder.

No one really wins when someone carries around that kind of bad attitude. Interests clash, someone ends up stung. The other party flies off, without a stinger, to spend their last few moments regretting having lost their temper.

I’d be the kind of bee you’d like to have around, unless you’re of the mindset that I’m responsible for flying around and pollinating plants so you’ll have stuff to eat.

I Don’t Want To Get Involved With That

I’m allergic to pollen. That would make life as a bee pretty tough. Here is a video of a bee who has just returned to the hive after finding some food. He gets the attention of his friends, then does a dance to tell them where the pollen is:

I would return to the hive, sneezing and coughing, and dance to deliver a completely different message. That message is – “this pollen is kicking my butt. Y’all help yourself, I’m going to take some NyQuil, lie down and watch TV.”

People are usually empathetic when their friends get sick. I guess bees are probably the same way, except when that friend gets sick every year during their busy season. Yes, being a bee with an allergy to pollen would be a difficult and lonely existence.

Spring Has Sprung

Things are green here in North Carolina. I’m so happy to be warm again and see leaves on the trees. I can go outside in a Hawaiian shirt and some shorts. I don’t even have to have shoes on; I just go right out in the yard with my Fred Flintstone feet.

I look forward to this time of year all winter. Then, whatever is blossoming this week does its thing and I become a mess.

Fred Ott's Sneeze (film by William K.L. Dickson)

No matter how many times you watch this, the guy misses the handkerchief every time. (Image via Wikipedia)

It could be worse though. I could be a dancing bee, red-eyed and sneezing, shaking what I’ve got in front of my friends. They’d stand there and watch for a bit and one would turn to another and ask “what’s he trying to say?”

“I don’t know, I’m just glad he’s too sick to sing.”

Ah-choo, everyone. Welcome to spring.


44 Comments on “Spring Is Here. It Could Be Worse. I Could Be A Bee.”

  1. The Hipster says:

    You know what this post is missing? A picture of your Fred Flintstone feet.
    I was feeling so sorry about your allergies, right up until you mentioned Hawaiian shirt, shorts and bare feet. Here’s what you’re not missing in Maryland: they’re calling for snow on Sunday.
    Oh, and gezundheit!

    • omawarisan says:

      They’re calling for snow? Change your order…bleah!

      I tried to take a picture of my feet, but they wouldnt fit in the frame

      • The Hipster says:

        Oh, the camera needs to be farther away. Try climbing up on a ladder.

        Snow is for Christmas Eve and school nights. Weekend snow is superfluous and unnecessary and I don’t care if that’s redundant. Snow in March — ridiculous, nay inconceivable (sorry, Wendy).

  2. I don’t know where to start. Allergies are horrible. I have said many times that if I were alive now and Actifed weren’t around, I wouldn’t be alive now. Also, aren’t bees disappearing? I hardly see them anymore. Also, I can’t stop watching that little film of the guy sneezing. I am mesmerized. This is the kind of thing people used to pay money to see. Also, Hipster says snow in Baltimore on Sunday? What? Seriously?

    • omawarisan says:

      I think they did pay to see that guy sneeze. There was some yowza, yowza, 23 skidoo music in the background!

      I hope bees arent disappearing. If it comes to pass that I am one, I wont be a killer bee, I will be a bee of reasonable discussion and consensus building.

  3. madtante says:

    I’m ashamed to say, that bee’s voice is Antonio Banderas…(ashamed to admit that I know). All I can say is he was an EXTREMELY hot young man. Then something happened and he’s sort of creepy. A YOUNG AB was smokin’, though.

  4. “Oma the Non-Confrontational Bee”…I think that would be a great cartoon character! He could have a Happy Face on his little yellow shirt, and hand out Kleenex to passersby!

    Thanks for the giggle!


  5. shoutabyss says:

    I’ll try not to drone on in this post. I have to get going soon and don my worker hat and become part of the hive mind. What a queen.

    I could have been a bee but I don’t dance. I guess we’ll leave that to the Bee Gees.

    I always refer to that bee in the commercial as Antonio Banderas. Now I learn that it’s really him? That rocks my world.

    • omawarisan says:

      See, I run an educational joint here, you get to learn what you already know.

      Its not much of a dance, looks like a figure 8 with a butt shake in the middle.

  6. Debbie says:

    Try some Claritin — non-drowsy and no side effects. Works, too! As for the weather, spring is such a lovely time of year. Too bad we’ve got 32 degrees, rain, snow flurries, and thick clouds, ugh!

  7. Thypolar says:

    I have horrible allergies. Spring is my enemy and the winds we are having the past couple of weeks are just killing me. Claritin just isn’t cutting it anymore. I’ve been sneezing for the past two days and with watery eyes I say “happy spring”!

  8. Kate says:

    I’m with The Hipster. Let’s see those feet! Or, maybe not. 😉

    Allergies are brutal. I don’t get them too bad in the spring, but they have been a huge menace to me in the summertime, particularly this last summer. My OTC drug of choice when my allergies are bad for several days in a row is generic Zyrtec-D. Doesn’t make me jumpy or jittery or sleepy, and I feel loads better once it gets in my bloodstream.

  9. linlah says:

    I’m sorry but why do you think you’d be a drone, you are clearly queen bee material.

  10. Elly Lou says:

    It snowed here yesterday. *kicks ground and pouts, stomps for good measure, books a flight to NC*

  11. Jane says:

    Cool video! I wonder if humans have a pollen-thumping, circle-dancin’ bee equivalent? He would have to be rich (that’s the pollen). He would have to be able to dance in a provacative style. He must have the ability to draw the attention of everyone nearby.

    OK, I’ll start the list:

    John Travolta

  12. Katybeth says:

    God Bless you!!

  13. spencercourt says:

    Allegra means never having to worry about Spring….

  14. planetross says:

    The calendar says Spring, but the weather says snow: I don’t know what to believe anymore.

    “Fred Flintstone feet” is a classic.

    I think I have some of those in the morning for a brief period these days.

    note: you have a way with words: you are “waywords” … or something like that.

  15. jaerae1971 says:

    I woke up to 9 degrees and ice covered everything. I want bees. Bees and golf.

  16. Would a bee keeper’s hat keep the pollen out? I think it would complete the look with the Hawaiian shirt and the bare feet. I hope you feel better!

    I don’t get that bee dance. Do they re-enact the route they took? Shimmy to the left on Vine Street off of Main, salsa on down to a right on Carriage Drive …

    Just saw this trailer yesterday. How fitting.

  17. A dancing bee, eh? Sounds like I’ve got an idea for my next Halloween costume.

  18. notajackass says:

    Spring?? Where? I tried looking underneath my bed this morning. Searched my cupboard as well. couldn’t find it anywhere. I am getting all roasted up in India here.

  19. frigginloon says:

    I would be so busy buzzing people if were a bee 🙂

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