I Don’t Think It’s Me This Time.Posted: May 27, 2011
Because of my particular occupational specialty, I am on call all the time. When things get bad and they decide to take me out of my box, I get a text message on a phone provided by my employer. The message describes the situation and lets me know where they need my particular skill set.
This is a paragraph that I am writing to give you to time to process the following idea before we move on to what I’m really writing about: somewhere in the world is a place where when things are really bad, someone says “uh-oh, someone call Omawarisan”. Kind of scary to consider, huh?
Moving along now…
Last week I got an email telling me that the people in charge of deciding such things had decided that we were changing cell phone companies. The mail told me that I should bring my phone, charger, car charger and belt clip to headquarters on a specified date to exchange it for new stuff compatible with our new carrier. The consequences for not turning in all the equipment would be dire.
I Face The Consequences, But That’s Not The Point
The old phone was issued to me at least three years ago. Because it was so long ago, I have no idea where the car charger and belt clip are. I decided the next best thing to do was to convince myself I was never issued those things. I’m nearly fifty years old, but I was still prepared to go with the nuh-uh defense as if I was nearly six:
Phone issuing guy: Where’s the car charger?
Me: You never gave me one.
Phone issuing guy: Everyone got one.
Armed with this top-notch defense, I went to collect my new phone…or face the consequences. They gave me the phone. They never asked for the other items. I think they could see in my eyes how formidable my nuh-uh defense was.
I did learn something from this phone exchange experience. Something horrifying.
I Work With Hoarders
Yes, hoarders. Hardcore hoarders.
I stood in line to make the swap carrying my old phone and a big handful of nothing else. There were a crowd of other people waiting to pick up their phones. Not surprisingly, many of them had both chargers and their belt clip ready to go. That’s not so unusual to me, but while I was in line I quietly resented them for not being considerate of my well planned defense.
What I thought was unusual was the number of people who had the chargers and belt clip as well as all the boxes and packing material that came with the phone when they were issued three years ago. My estimate is that twenty percent of those around me turned in all their equipment and like new packing materials. Why on earth would anyone still have that stuff?
One guy even had the package for his car charger. Both he and I left with a new phone, chargers and a belt clip. By the time I left work all the boxes and packing material were in the office recycling bin. My guess is that car charger package guy went home with all that stuff. I think one of us is just a little over the top on this issue.
Do I think it’s me?