Pencil Thin UnibrowPosted: April 21, 2016 Filed under: Foolishness, Uncategorized | Tags: comedy, humor, life, people who shave off their eyebrows, postaweek, unibrow 6 Comments
Today, while I was running errands I saw a woman. Not just any woman.She lacked eyebrows. I’m pretty certain that there wasn’t a medical reason for her having a naked brow. No, this was self-inflicted.
As we walked toward each other, I crossed to the other side of the street. My car being on that side of the road was there was only part of the reason I crossed. Mostly, it was because she terrified me.
I jumped in my car and buckled up; when I looked up, she was about to cross the street. This was a difficult situation which forced me to look at her again. The fact that she’d shaved off her eyebrows and drew them back on made her, well, a challenging sight to describe.
“Drew Them Back On” Is Deceiving
Now, you’ve probably seen folks who’ve shaved their eyebrows, then drawn them back in. And, unless you’re one of those folks, you’ve also probably wondered why they’d do that. I usually try to figure out why they’d commit to a permanent facial expression – surprise, for example.
When I said that this woman had drawn her eyebrows back on, it was somewhat misleading. Factual, but misleading. She did replace her eyebrows by drawing them, but she didn’t draw eyebrows, just one eyebrow. One long eyebrow, from the left edge of her brow, across her forehead to the right edge.
Was She Mad? Was She Happy?
She looked at me, I smiled and waved to let her know it was safe to cross in front of my car. The woman walked across the street, turning to look at me. Maybe she knew why I was laughing. Perhaps she didn’t. It was hard for me to tell from her expression. Her pencil thin uni-brow made her countenance hard to read.
Was it angry confusion she was trying to express? Perhaps it was bemused frustration. I’ll never know if her look was meant to show appreciation or intimidation. I hit the gas as soon as she was safely on the sidewalk. My sides hurt too much to linger a moment more.
Was it the Boston Blackie kind?
Could’ve been. I didn’t ask, I was laughing too hard.
Coulda been that she drew on her brow for the sole purpose of creating content for a blog?
Good point. I’ve been struggling for topics recently.
Wait, what if she was an angel?
Makes perfect sense! A mystical unibrow angel sent from the heavens! You sir, have a gift. From the heavens.
Eyebrows are sacred and that is self mutilation! Of course I have longed for nice healthy eyebrows to shape all my life and envy all who have them. To deliberately erase them from your face…I just can’t imagine what would make someone do that. On the other hand, she certainly got your attention.