Why We Put Our Napkins In Our Laps

Back when I was a kid, my parents made sure to keep me attentive to my manners. I fought them on one of their teachings. I didn’t see the sense in putting my napkin in my lap.

It seemed to me that if the napkin was on the table, it would be easier to see. I’m a visual kind of guy, so I still believe that, but… Read the rest of this entry »

Five Routine Minutes: Was It The Old Switcheroo?

When I arrived at the bagel shop I opened the door and allowed another customer to enter ahead of me.

Once inside, the gentleman who I’d let in said “please, go ahead of me.” I turned the offer down, but he insisted.

Let’s review the story so far. I let him in. He returned the favor. Here is a diagram of these transactions:

I order one bagel.

After I order, I move to the line to pay. The other guy orders a dozen bagels and then…

…jumps in front of me to pay!

This was unprecedented. I’d never seen this situation before.

At first, I thought it might be the old switcheroo. I thought about it and determined that it was not.

Since I could not label what this man did, I was powerless to counter the move. Fixing situations is what I do. I’m not used to being powerless.

How To Accept A Compliment

Some time ago, a teacher gave me a valuable lesson. He taught me how to accept a compliment. I forget the lesson now and again. When I do, a moment spent reflecting on those few minutes in the classroom brings me back to the correct way to respond.

I learned the lesson in a sixth grade classroom. I was twenty-six years old when this happened.

It is probably important to clarify that I completed the sixth grade before I was twenty-six.  Getting out of the sixth grade before my mid-twenties was a goal my parents set for me. I can proudly say I met that goal. Don’t be afraid to help your kids aim high. Don’t stop believin’.

Now, back to our story. Read the rest of this entry »

The Kung Pao Exception

You might have noticed that I am big on people treating each other right. Life is too short to fool with someone who is impolite. Usually, if I find a business person unpleasant to deal with I do not patronize their establishment.

I am such a liar sometimes.

The Exception

Ding Baozhen (simplified Chinese: 丁宝桢; traditi...

Kung Pao. Best governor ever. (Image via Wikipedia)

I love Chinese food. Chinese food is one of my major food groups. I may actually be Chinese. I don’t think my parents know that. I think that they are proud I am their son and I feel certain they will accept me as their only Asian child.

My parents raised me to stand up for myself and my principles. Mom and Dad, when you read this, I hope you know that I mostly do what you taught me. There’s this exception though. The Kung Pao exception.

Where there is good Chinese food, there is room for compromise on my principles. Where the Kung Pao Chicken is exceptional, I am willing to deal with indignity and rudeness that I could never tolerate in any other arena. I can not explain this. I can’t even think of a similar exception in any part of my life. Read the rest of this entry »

Deploying My Predator Drone

I don’t really have a lot of need for military hardware. Things like that are best left to the competent and brave people that we’re all blessed to have looking after us. There is one thing I am going to need.   

It is time for me to have a Predator Drone of my very own.   

First, A Disclaimer

I would never use my Predator Drone to attack anyone. I’m not a violent guy by any measure.   

Conferencia de Prensa / Press conference

Scientists From My R&D Staff Conduct A Press Conference (Image by Eneas via Flickr)


I would, however, make sure to get some press coverage of me at the local airport taking delivery of the Omawari-drone. Why? Because I want some people to know I have it. The thought of me having a drone would certainly be enough for those people.   

Sometimes it’s truly the thought that counts, isn’t it? Read the rest of this entry »